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| Our baby girl's footprints |
This is kind of difficult to do, since the experience is so fresh in my mind, but I feel that I should write about this. On Monday, instead of finding out of we were having a boy or a girl, the ultrasound showed us a little baby with no heartbeat. Jason and I were shocked--this was not what we were planning on. The next few days became a blur, like a very bad dream you can't get out of, as we talked to doctors, did blood work and prepared for me to have a D&E ( Dilation and Extraction). On Wednesday I went into the hospital for my operation to have our little baby taken out. Everything went smoothly and I had a wonderful medical staff who was very compassionate and friendly. Friends in the ward immediately reached out and made dinners for us and helped out in any way. Jason was especially amazing as he supported me and made sure that I knew I was loved.
I know there is a purpose is all things and I have learned many important lessons this week, one being that my Heavenly Father loves me dearly and is mindful of my sorrows and grief. Jason and I have learned to lean on the power of prayer and I have felt expecially close to my Father in Heaven this week as I have called on Him for support, comfort, peace and understanding. I know this is a time for me to practice my faith and patience and I know that Jason and I will see our little baby girl someday. We have hope and we look forward to the day when we will have children, but until then we will put our faith in our Father in Heaven to get us through this time.
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A carving that Jason got for me when I went into the hospital;
a memento of our baby and a reminder of the joy we will have in having children |
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