A Masquerade Ball

Last weekend my friend Emily turned 30. So to celebrate the beginning of a new decade and a milestone year she threw a masquerade party! We got dressed up, wore masks, had a photo booth, drank "mocktails" and dined on exquisite cake. I thought to myself, "This is how everyone should treat their birthdays as they get older--it is a time to celebrate and be happy! I feel like our culture shuns old age and we do everything in our power to stop or even reverse the effects of aging. But aging another year means we have grown a little wiser and, hopefully, a little more grateful for our family and friends. I hope with each new milestone I embrace my aging and say "Come what may and love it!"

The Sewing Madness Continues!

 This has definitely been March Madness, and I'm not talking about basketball ( although Jimmer did have a pretty dang good show!) I have really gotten into this sewing gig and right now I am on a tote bag kick. There is definite room for improvement and I continue seeing tote bags everywhere that I want to try and make. Slowly. little by little I am becoming more bold and daring as I venture forth into the colorful world of fabrics and seams and trimmings. The blue bag was a big improvement from my first one, and the brown and green one was made even better. Hopefully I can continue to refine my sewing skills until I become a sewing master!!!

Sewing Therapy

A few girls in the ward and I decided that we needed to  feed our creative appetites, so we started getting together every Monday for an afternoon of working on some sort of crafty project. We each bring our own thing, hang out and maybe eat something yummy! Well, I finished my baby blanket and I've been feeling the need to get into sewing. I feel like if I have some big sewing project then my mind will be distracted from other recent events. But I have also learned that deciding to sew something like a quilt isn't as easy as stitching two pieces of fabric together. I quickly learned the other day that just cutting the darn fabric is tricky! But I went out and bought myself a cutting mat, a rotar (?) cutting thingie and a plastic ruler and began practicing!

         So yesteday at our crafty pow-wow I asked them what I should make and they suggested a tote/bag. So based off of a simply pattern I constructed my very own mini tote! It has so many mistakes and stray pieces of thread it's not even funny. But as long as I keep it far enough away from people's picky eyes and maybe swing it around a bit  no one will notice. :)               Making this bag was also extremely theraputic. I was extremely focused and I felt like I had purpose again, which is something I have felt lacking as of late. Even if my purpose was a short-term goal of finishing that bag, I accomplished it and I felt really good about myself! There is something very rewarding about making something by yourself. 

 I think I'll use it as a scripture case...

In Memory of our Little Baby



Our baby girl's footprints

This is kind of difficult to do, since the experience is so fresh in my mind, but I feel that I should write about this. On Monday, instead of finding out of we were having a boy or a girl, the ultrasound showed us a little baby with no heartbeat. Jason and I were shocked--this was not what we were planning on. The next few days became a blur, like a very bad dream you can't get out of, as we talked to doctors, did blood work and prepared for me to have a D&E ( Dilation and Extraction). On Wednesday I went into the hospital for my operation to have our little baby taken out. Everything went smoothly and I had a wonderful medical staff who was very compassionate and friendly. Friends in the ward immediately reached out and made dinners for us and helped out in any way. Jason was especially amazing as he supported me and made sure that I knew I was loved.
    I know there is a purpose is all things and I have learned many important lessons this week, one being that my Heavenly Father loves me dearly and is mindful of my sorrows and grief. Jason and I have learned to lean on the power of prayer and I have felt expecially close to my Father in Heaven this week as I have called on Him for support, comfort, peace and understanding. I know this is a time for me to practice my faith and patience and I know that Jason and I will see our little baby girl someday. We have hope and we look forward to the day when we will have children, but until then we will put our faith in our Father in Heaven to get us through this time.

A carving that Jason got for me when I went into the hospital;
 a memento of our baby and a reminder of the joy we will have in having children